Voicemails for Isabelle and an old-school (forever will be cherished) radio.

Good morning my darlings.

I’m just sitting here with a bagel and my coffee, and I may go back to bed for an hour, but we’ll see.

Let’s chat.

The day before yesterday, the woman who lives right above me and I – were chatting and she asked if I’ve seen the new Netflix movie (Voicemails for Isabelle).

I told her I have not seen it, but I’d watch it soon and let her know if I liked it or not.

She said she cried within the first 10-15 minutes.

I cried within the first 10-15 minutes.

I watched it last night, and I absolutely loved it!

It was sad. It was funny. It was cute.

It was a movie that shows that even the best things can come out of grief, sadness, anger, etc.

That beautiful things can happen after pain.

The movie focuses on Jill losing her little sister that she’s always been so close to, so she continues to call her sister (Isabelle’s) phone number thinking it’s still connected, and Jill finds comfort in leaving Izzy many voicemails on different days, venting – chatting – and sharing things like she used to when Izzy was alive.

She always feels better after leaving Izzy a message.

She has no idea that the number was disconnected and recycled.

That the number now belongs to some guy’s work phone, (Wes) – and he is listening to all of the messages Jill is leaving Izzy, and hears all of her crazy stories, things that are going on in her life, and things she vents and jokes about. She has no idea that it makes him smile. It makes him laugh.

He plans to tell her she has the wrong number – not knowing the situation and why she’s leaving these messages or who Izzy is, but he’s intrigued by her and her funny, wild, crazy voicemails, so he doesn’t tell her that number is no longer Izzy’s (whoever Izzy is – because again – he has no idea!).

He lets her keep calling and he keeps listening.

Eventually, he finds a way to get just enough information to look her up on social media, and when he sees her photos and who she is, he finds her attractive, and he’s even more interested in listening to new voicemails from her – for Izzy.

My daughter and I laughed and called him a stalker, but I corrected my daughter and joked that there’s a big difference between creepy stalking and cute stalking. He did some cute stalking. lol. (I’m just being funny, but it was cute that he looked her up and checked her out).

I don’t want to give the whole movie away, but it’s something you should totally watch if you have the time, and I laughed a lot in this movie, but I also cried a lot, especially at the end – when this guy (Wes) asks for a sign, and he gets it. ❤️

It’s definitely a MUST WATCH, and one of my new favorite movies!

My daughter was also laughing when one of Wes’s friends asked, “What is it about her, Wes?”, and he starts listing everything he loves, and says her cheeks are always filled with food – like this “Sexy Chipmunk”. I told my daughter, “See? I’m a Sexy Chipmunk, too!”. I made her laugh even more.

If you want to giggle a bit, I went outside in the middle of the movie last night to move my car to the garage because the weather was calling for tornados in our area (or close by) possibly, and the sky looked awful, so if we had hail, I didn’t need my car damaged.

I had cried right before going outside – because of this movie, so when another woman who lives upstairs but diagonal from my place – was out there and started talking to me about a kitten we always see in the garages, I apologized for the way I looked and told her I was “ugly crying to a movie I was watching”. She laughed and said she’s the same way.

The movie was fantastic, and it helped a lot that the guy who played (Wes) – Nick Robinson – is a hottie. 😊

Listen.

If there was a poster with him (from this scene on it) – it would be framed and hanging above my bed.

I’m just saying! 🤣

I loved the movie.

10/10 – I recommend!

……………………………………………

Other than the movie – check this out:

One of the tenants in the facility I work for – came downstairs last week and asked if I wanted this radio.

It’s totally Vintage.

He said he’s had it since he got married many – many – many years ago.

He’s an older guy that I adore so much, and he’s always joking around, making me laugh and he’s goofy.

He’ll tell you he has a history with crazy women – including his now ex-wife, and he did just that – and that’s why he said he doesn’t want it anymore, but it still works.

I wasn’t going to take it. I didn’t think I had any use for it, but ……………after some thinking, I realized I’d love to have this radio, and I’d cherish it because it came from him.

It’s now a sentimental radio for me because I’ve grown close to this old guy, and he’s hilarious.

Even when he’s pissed off and running his mouth on certain days – he still looks at me when he’s going off on people, and we both laugh because that’s just who he is, and he knows I’m not going to stop him.

I tell him to be nice, and sometimes – when I already know he’s going to say something he shouldn’t – I’ll look at him and tell him, “DON’T DO IT!”, and he laughs because he knows I already know what he’s thinking, and what he’s going to say or do.

He’s got a lot of health issues, so my son and I both agreed (because my older son works with me on the weekends) – that if this man ever passes, we’re going to miss the heck out of him. We’re going to be so sad when we lose this guy, and hopefully it won’t happen for many more years, but we know he’s old and brittle.

So, after thinking about what an honor it would be for me to have this man’s old radio that he’s had forever now and no longer wants, I did take it. It does work, and it sounds so clear – but the only issue – is that we don’t have many good radio stations in Minnesota, so I won’t use it now.

Still, I know that if and when we move back to IL. or closer to it, I’ll have many more radio stations and choices, and this radio will look so cute on my kitchen counter, and it will give me something to listen to when I’m cooking or baking. 😊I do need to give it a good scrub down, but I love it!

I remember almost losing this guy at the beginning of this year.

He was really sick, and some of the employees at the facility wanted to go say “Goodbye” to him – so, some went to go see him.

My older son and I – went as well. He wasn’t expected to make it.

When my son and I walked into the hospital room that day, this man couldn’t even keep his eyes open, and he struggled to talk. His breathing was shallow and we thought for sure he wouldn’t make it past that weekend. We were talking to him, and I was holding his hand the entire time – while we just watched him doze in and out, and we sat there quietly some moments – just watching T.V. and watching this man rest.

The facility we work in houses the previously homeless, some Criminals, some addicts, recovering addicts, and alcoholics / recovering alcoholics. He’s one of the alcoholics, and we give what they call “Portions” (little bits of alcohol) followed on a plan – to certain alcoholics, so they avoid their withdrawal symptoms and them getting sick from it.

When we were in the hospital that day, this man (that I’ll call Denny) – suddenly woke up, looked over at my older son and I – and tried saying something. We couldn’t understand him, and he finally yelled, “PORTION!”. We laughed because of course Denny is going to ask for his portion, or for us to sneak him one in, and it just made our night seeing him joke around – even if we didn’t expect him to make it that time.

I laughed and told him, “I can’t believe you just said that!”. He smiled and went back to sleep, only to wake up and ask for a cigarette. I playfully – softly hit his arm and told him, “You’re on Oxygen my dude!”.

Eventually, he fell back asleep and woke up – no longer smiling, trying to talk, or anything.

He was coughing. Struggling to breathe. Nodding in and out of sleep.

I decided to let him rest that night, and told my older son we should go, so he could sleep, but every time I thought he was fully asleep and I tried to pull my hand out of his, he squeezed my hand tighter – at one point – shaking his head no and refusing to let us leave.

When we told him we had to go, he looked so sad, and when we got out of that hospital that day, the tears started to fall.

I couldn’t help it.

He’s become one of the main people at this facility that we have grown so close to and grown to love dearly, and I didn’t know if I’d ever see him again after we walked out of there, but thankfully – by the Grace of God – he was back in our facility a few weeks later – looking healthier, so much better, and so full of life.

He still comes down to try to get his portion an hour earlier, and we still have to distract him and talk about other things, so he forgets about it until it’s time. We still have to try to get him to eat because if he could live off alcohol, milk and Sardines – he totally would, but I’m so grateful he’s still with us, and that he’s still his hilarious, crazy, wild, no filter – self.

I’m glad I have a piece of his history with me, even though it’s just a radio, but to me – it’s not.

It’s HIS radio, and he decided he wanted to give it to me. 😊

I’ll forever love this thing, and I hope that in the long future – far from now hopefully – when God wants me back – my older son will keep this radio and cherish it forever – maybe put it in his kitchen one day – to remember Denny and to remember me and the way I loved it because it was from one of our favorite tenants.

Ah well.

I guess I should go get my day started, huh?

🌸Shel🌸

If I could tell my 20-year-old self – something, The “D” word hits one of my favorite couples, and a rained-out baseball game.

Daily writing prompt
What is something you wish you could tell your 20-year-old self?

“Baby, go to college and start a career now. If you wait, life is going to kick your ass!”.

Today’s WP writing prompt asked. I’m answering.

I know they say that no matter how old you are, it’s never too late to go back to school, but I will also add to that – that it’s a lot harder if you’re older.

If you’re in your 20’s – Do it while you’re young! Go to college NOW!

I was raising a kid when I was 20, and I was still partying and living my best life, so I wasn’t thinking about college.

I wanted to go.

I knew I should go to college right then and there.

Well, I did go for a little bit, but not the way I should have been.

I enrolled for Psychology because at the time – that’s what I thought I wanted to do, but I dropped those classes because then I thought I wanted to be a nurse.

I took up CNA classes at first and planned to get my LPN license. Eventually, I wanted to go for my RN license because I wanted to be a Labor and Delivery nurse, but sometimes – not all pregnancies and births go the way they’re supposed to, and I knew I didn’t want to see the awful side of it. The pregnancies and births that didn’t go smoothly, or the babies that ended up in the NICU for whatever reasons.

So……………

I left those classes because Massage therapy sounded nice, but I wasn’t interested in the fact that we had to get completely naked in class, and work on each other (because that’s part of Massage therapy) in real life. Of course, we were all covered by thin sheets, but still.

I left those classes, and when I finally figured out what I really wanted to do – I should have just gone to college, stuck with it, finished and got into my career young.

I always knew what I wanted to be or do from the time I was 15, (Probation officer) so it wasn’t like I was still “trying to figure it out”. Or was I? Maybe I was just trying to make sure before I enrolled in classes again.

When I finally knew for sure……………….

I just didn’t feel like I had time for that because when was I going to spend time with my kid, or have time to party? I was making the wrong choices and felt like I had all the time in the world for college, and “I’ll go one day”. That was my mind-set and I wish it wasn’t back then, but the reality is – even though I am now 43, and graduated college with two Criminal Justice degrees, it was so much harder to balance work, kids, bills, and life in general when I did finally go to college at the age of 39.

I graduated with my associate degree in 2023, and my BA degree in 2025, and I am so proud of that.

It is proof that no matter how old you are, you can still go back to school and do something with yourself, but – it is so much harder as you get older and have to balance different things, meet school paper deadlines and do projects, and so on.

If I had a chance to tell my 20-year-old self – something – it would be not to wait. To go to college while you’re 20 and only have one kid. While you’re not working crazy hours and overtime and paying all these bills, and losing your damn mind trying to survive in your 40’s.

I am still so proud of all the men and women who do go to college at a later age and finish, but it’s a lot harder, and I’m sure many would agree with me.

It’s not easy to raise kids, pay bills, work their asses off and are my age – just now going to college to better their lives.

I will also say that as we get older – even if we graduate college and have the best GPA’s and degrees, it’s not enough to get the career you want because now you’re a lot older, and people our ages are looking forward to only working the next 20-something years and living the rest of our lives having fun, retired and happy – not just trying to start the career you wanted to start many years ago while you were younger, and didn’t get your ass into college right away.

It’s not only harder going to college when you’re older, but also to start a career you want when you’re older.

I do suggest if you’re in your teens or 20’s and you’re reading this – you plan to go to college right after high school and get the career you want while you’re still young enough to do so.

As for me, I sadly live in an area / small town – where there isn’t many or any opportunities to be in the career I want, so, I will be moving somewhere bigger and better in the next few months to a year and making sure I make this happen for myself, but………….

………………… don’t wait to go to college and think you can be what you want to be later, because sometimes – that doesn’t happen, it may be too late, and you just need to motivate yourself to do it now.

Hell, even if you’re in your 40’s, 50’s, 60’s and still thinking about college and wish you could – you SHOULD!

It’s never too late. It just becomes a little harder, but if I did it, why not you?

SO, I’d just tell my 20-year-old self to enroll, finish now, and become what you’ve always wanted to become.

Don’t wait.

Besides that……………..

I think by now – we all went to bed last night or woke up this morning to the shocking and sad news that:

(Image taken from TMZ)

I was scrolling Facebook last night, and I scrolled past a TMZ post reporting it, and we all know that TMZ doesn’t report it – if it’s not facts, right? They are my “go-to” when I want to check sources and make sure the news I hear is real.

I was so heartbroken to hear this because what the hell?

Jelly and Bunnie seemed like they were so happy.

They seemed like the perfect couple.

I just read Bunnie’s new book about how they were healing together after everything that happened in their past with each other and as individuals.

I heard a few months ago, Bunnie was doing treatments to try to get pregnant and have their baby.

So, this came out of nowhere for everyone, and I think the entire world is feeling this.

I’m not a huge Jelly roll fan, but him as a person and all the good things that he has done for others – makes him an amazing person, and we all know I absolutely adore and love Bunnie XO. She’s real, raw and doesn’t care what people think.

She inspires others to not care what people think, and she has done so much good for others as well.

So, to hear that he filed for this divorce, it’s sad.

It just proves that when others see another couple looking all cuddled up and happy, all cute and think that they are “the perfect couple”, we never know what goes on behind closed doors, or what struggles their marriage is having.

A married couple could look so happy and perfect outdoors around people, go home together, and be miserable.

The wife is unhappy and truly wants a divorce, but they have kids, assets, a business, or whatever else they own together, so it will be tough and expensive to get out of the marriage, or the husband feels that way. Maybe both – but not all “happy and perfect” marriages are the way they seem and Jelly and Bunnie proved that.

Someone in our family – or our friend groups can seem like they have the healthiest, best marriage and in reality, when the couple is home alone – they’re doing nothing but fighting, or not speaking to each other and not sleeping in the same bed anymore.

We never know the reality of what couples DON’T want us to see, so – we think and see what they portray, and that’s how it is now with Bunnie and Jelly. He filed in May, and nobody knew anything until they just announced it and news channels reported it.

Bunnie was with Jelly when he had nothing. She helped him financially, emotionally and mentally when he was going through some of his darkest times, and she helped raise his daughter, and he did a lot of things for her as well, so I’m hoping they remain good friends, continue to be there for each other, and get to live their individual happy lives now – apart. 💔

NOBODY SAW THIS ONE COMING, but that’s life.

******

Baseball:

We drove an hour 1/2 away to another part of Minnesota last night for the double-header our team was supposed to play, but while GPS showed at first it was 2-hours, it was about an hour and some minutes or so.

We got their and my kids were speechless at how beautiful and huge this other school was.

They have their own ICE arena, and my kids joked that if those kids ever came to our little town, they’d want to turn around go back to their little town.

Anyway, it was cold.

The weather called for storms, and it was lightening with rumbles of thunder way off in the distance, but we all knew it was going to eventually get to us.

The coaches kept an eye on the weather, and there were talks about either waiting it out for the 2nd game, or rescheduling. As we sat on the bleachers, the clouds got lower, darker, and weather apps were saying, “Take shelter now”. That part of Minnesota has seen a few tornados, and I just told my kids to be ready to run to the car, open it and start it up, and I’d grab Elijah (my little dude), and I’d run to the car as well.

I wanted to make sure they were safe, while I made sure my little dude was safe – if anything major happened, but – thankfully, it just started pouring right after we won our first game against this school, and the boys all ran into the dugout to eat hotdogs, and whatever else the moms and dads brought.

We brought the chips, and I felt like I should have gotten something healthy, but I was so happy to hear that almost every kid on the team dug into the chips, and they were good with it. 😁

My little dude came running over to me and told me the coach said he could leave because they probably weren’t playing the 2nd game. I walked over to the coach to make sure – because sometimes, my little dude likes to play around too much, but he was right.

Our Coach and the coach from the other team were talking about how it wasn’t supposed to stop raining until later, and they were talking about rescheduling. The other coach mentioned how if the boys went back onto the field, they’d be cold, wet and miserable and I was glad he made that call to end it for the night.

So, we were able to leave and get home earlier than we expected, and it was nice to not have to drive late on dark, country roads. We drove while it was still light outside and got home safely by the grace of God!

The boys have an hour-long practice today.

I had to laugh when we were leaving the field yesterday, walking to the car and my daughter ran past me.

She yelled, “Go! Go! Run! I stole a box of the chips we brought!”.

She was running, so I thought she was serious. I yelled her name and told her to get back by me, but she stopped running, laughed and said she was just joking.

She smiled and said, “If I were to steal anything – it wouldn’t be a box of chips!”. She was raised right, and she knows better, so I’m not worried about her stealing anything, but I did think she took the box of chips – maybe thinking they were done with it.

I had brought two boxes, and she said she grabbed a bag, and one of the coaches told her all the boys already had chips, and they were done, so she was able to take that box home.

All-in-all, the boys had fun yesterday before the wind picked up and it started raining.

There were no tornados.

We got home safe.

I was up early this morning, and this mama hasn’t had coffee yet, so I love you all and hope you have a blessed day if you run across this!

❤️Shel❤️

Baseball.

Good morning honey bunches!

My little dude had his second game last night for the team he plays on.

They played against another school.

Last week, they won their first game and last night – they won their second. ❤️

We traveled almost an hour away to get to that school, and it was a good game.

The coach from the other team drove me crazy because he wouldn’t just let the kids have fun.

He had to keep screaming at his team and he sounded like he was getting aggravated because our team kept scoring. These poor kids couldn’t concentrate on the game because they were hearing him all up in their ears.

I couldn’t concentrate on the game because he kept screaming plays at his team while they were on the field.

I felt like walking up to him and telling him:

I’m just being funny, but I seriously wanted to go tell him to let his team play and that nobody wants to hear him screaming every second.

He was calling his teams names so much, they didn’t know if they should look at the ball or look at him.

I love our coaches!

Our coaches were peaceful and quietly gave our boys advice and then backed off and let them do their thing – while encouraging them and cheering them on.

Our coaches know the boys have to concentrate and to leave them be when they’re on the field.

The boys know what they’re doing and if they don’t, the coaches will jump in and simply let them know what to do. Other than that, our coaches are calm, respectful, and know it’s just a game – win or lose.

I think after we were able to get many homeruns, he finally gave up and finally stopped screaming onto the field.

Still, our boys won. They did a great job. They worked so well together, and I was proud of my son because while he is still learning to bat a little better, the coaches did an amazing job at getting him to at least know when and how to bat. He was able to hit the ball and get to 1st base, and beyond.

I saw him smile on 1st base and it made me smile as a mother. He was proud of himself, and he had every right to be! 😊

I love that the boys on our team cheer each other on. I love that the other parents cheer each other’s kids on.

I will say that I feel so bad because I don’t know all of their kid’s names. I know a few of the kids on the team from being in classes with my son over the years, but I don’t know them all, so when other parents are cheering for the boys at bat – or out in the field – I just go with the flow and listen for who they’re cheering for.

I still feel a little out of place.

I’m not from here, and I don’t know all of the parents.

I’ve gotten to know a few great ones, and I’m so grateful that they’ve been so friendly and welcoming, so supportive and kind, but it still feels a little awkward to be around a bunch of people who grew up knowing each other, or who have been friends forever since they’ve all lived in this little town forever, and I just came here years ago.

Either way, Elijah is loving this and I’m going to keep driving him wherever he needs to go for games, and keep showing up to all of his games, rain or shine. Knowing everyone or not.

Feeling out of place or not.

I miss home.

I miss my people.

I miss my friends.

I miss my family.

I miss familiar places.

It’s been hard adjusting to life in this little town, and I’m always so blessed when someone I meet out here – acts like I’ve been here forever, and treats me like I’m one of them, so I thank them for that.

I think getting out and being around other moms and dads has been good for me because ever since my oldest passed, I haven’t wanted to be around anyone. I admit – I’ve isolated myself and have thrown myself into work and have avoided making new friends, meeting new people or going out – as much as possible, and I need to get back to living life.

I’ve had a few good laughs with the other baseball moms and dads and having great conversations while watching our kids play – has done something good for my soul. ❤️

I’m happy I got Elijah involved with baseball and on the team, and that he’s loved it and has thrived on it.

Remember when I said I volunteered to clean bathrooms and take out the garbage after two games because parents were asked to sign up to volunteer for something? I got out of that 2nd bathroom cleaning sign up because it stormed yesterday, and most teams were cancelling their games, so the main coaches’ wife messaged me – saying I didn’t have to do the 2nd clean up yesterday like I was supposed to. Like I signed up for.

Yay for that – because if you also remember if you read my last post – I had to scoop out (with many napkins) – Sunflower seeds from a urinal the 1st clean up I did.

Our next game is a long drive away, but that’s not until next Monday, so I have time to relax a bit.

I remember doing traveling Basketball and Football with my older son, so the traveling thing is nothing new to me when it comes to sports.

I think this Baseball thing is good for both my little dude and me.

In other news………………

I’m a little jealous right now that Illinois is getting storms, and it’s sunny and clear here.

I love a good storm!

Did I mention I miss home?

Part of my goals for the next two months involve taking on a 2nd job, getting my daughter’s bunny the surgery it needs, paying off some bills and a good chuck of my car, and saving to move closer to home.

Part of me thought of making our little town home, and just buying a house here.

I’d love for my son to continue to play on this great team and grow up playing with the same boys he’s playing ball with now, but I know my other kids and myself – could never fully be happy here.

It’s a tough situation and tough choices need to be made, but I believe wherever we move – my son will thrive in baseball, and I want that “happily ever after” wherever we are. Just my kids and I. I want us all to be happy.

I hate decisions when it comes to knowing what’s best and what our hearts really want.

Let me go get my day started.

Love you!

😊Shel😊